Getting Your Child Ready for Bedtime
Every parent has heard, “No night, night,” “I’m not sleepy!” or “Just a few more minutes, please…” from their child when it’s time to go to bed. And that’s why parents often report bedtime as one of the most challenging times of the day.
Try these quick tips to make sure your child has sweet dreams:
- Create a bedtime ritual and stick to it. Most human beings like ritual and predictability. Start with a set bedtime based on the child’s age and daily activities. If the child is older and mature enough to assist in the decision making process, try to include him or her in determining a bedtime. A child is more likely to be compliant if he or she is part of the decision making.
- Stop all interactive activities one hour prior to bed. These activities might include video games, computer use, television viewing, movie watching or active/physical games. Substitute a quiet activity such as reading, writing and quiet play for the last hour.
- Remove televisions, computers, DVD players and hand held electric games from the child’s room. Science is now discovering that these devices can continue to negatively impact a person’s sleep cycle even when not turned on.
- Throughout the day use the bedroom as a place of rest and quiet rather than a gathering place for loud, active interactions.
- Begin bedtime preparations 30 minutes before bedtime. Make this part of the ritual. Personal hygiene issues such as brushing/flossing teeth, showering/bathing, drinking that last glass of water, and getting into bed clothes all need to be completed in this time period. For younger children model what this looks like by including yourself in this part of the ritual. You may feel a little silly getting ready for bed at 7:30 p.m. but you will be helping your child form a positive pre-bedtime regimen.
- Stop nagging. Music can be a great transition tool. Select a song that will signal to your child it is time to move into the next activity, whether it is bedtime preparations, actually getting into bed, or story time. Make it fun and be consistent.
- Find time to read, talk or tell stories to your child as he or she prepares for sleep. This gives a child a sense of safety, tradition and connection to adults.
- If the child can tolerate it, make the room as dark and quiet as possible. Do not expect a child to fall asleep easily if he or she can stay awake listening to adults watch television or visit with one another loudly in the next room. Parental arguments which can be easily overheard by a child attempting to sleep cause increased stress and anxiety which can continue to feed into the negative bedtime behaviors.
- Children with attention challenges often are helped by letting them listen to books on tape as they drift off to sleep. The books on tape give their minds something specific to focus on which will often relax them enough to enter into sleep. A word of caution, think about the book on tape you are selecting, avoid books with violence or loss as they may contribute to the child’s stress rather than serve to reduce it.
- Progressive relaxation is a great tool to help children fall asleep or lie quietly. Start with the toes and tense and relax them. Move up through the body until you can relax the mind. This activity gives focus to the body and mind and will help the child physically relax. A word of caution to exhausted parents…you may find yourself falling asleep before your child when you practice this together!
- Tuck your child in. Tell them you love them and that you will ensure his or her safety. Turn out the light and leave. If your child struggles with staying in bed and is a master at developing reasons to get up, let the child know you will check in at 10-15 minute intervals until he or she is asleep. Initially, you may have to remain outside the door to ensure the child remains in the room. Try to avoid engaging in conversation with the child until the promised check in time. Remember, the time you take to break this pattern will be worth it in the long run. Be consistent and follow through.